Abandon Ship: Low Job Satisfaction, Resignation and My Last Day At Work

Yesterday was my last day at work.  I cannot but to feel sad and angry at the same time. Sad that I have to leave the company where I spent the first four years of my employment life. Angry that my pod manager failed to materialize the plans she had for me and my pod.

It was my first company. It was months after graduated when I got hired as a web content writer in 2009. But there was not much writing at the beginning. I did accounts creation, editing, quality check and other non-writing tasks. Later in the middle of 2010, I accomplished much writing alongside doing search engine optimization work like link building and bookmarking. Enter 2011, I was already writing SEO articles.

My stint at writing came to a temporary halt when management had to dissolve the SEO pod due to the lack of clients. So from September 2012 to February 2013 I was a struggling coder, but coding was never my thing. I never got the hang of it. I managed to make some codes work, though. I contemplated resignation at times.

Later this year my pod manager called me back to writer because the SEO pod had enough clients to rebuild operation. However, it was the time when my job satisfaction was lowering. Why?

I had not received much feedback for my tasks and less supervision too. My pod manager and my pod leader were working from their homes and I was the only one working onsite at the office.

The pod manager talked too much, telling me she is going to conduct training workshops for me and the pod to improve. She is going to share me videos and manuals so I can look into them and learn from them. The pod leader, on the other hand, was quiet, never bothering to impart motivation or assistance.

My job satisfaction sank lower than the Marianas Trench. I thought at times if I have ever loved my job or if my job loved me. I wondered if I had improved in my writing skills, if I have learned anything at all. I felt motivated and lethargic. I was too lazy to write.

Then last month, my pod manager came to work to talk about my output. She was not happy that I was only submitting three articles a day. She wanted me to do six or else she had to let me go. I can no longer handle the lethargy at work, so I told her I am going to resign. And to resign I did.

It was sad that I had to leave the place I had considered my primary home for the last four years. I had been under different administration changes, different workplace changes. My workmates were the fewest social contacts I had in this Philippine city considered as one of the most popular tourist destinations in the country.

I had much memories with my workmates, and they are now nostalgia for me.  I departed as friends. I exited without begrudging anyone except for my pod manager (who had the nerve to smoke in front of me as we talked bout my clearance yesterday) and my pod leader who was never a leader for me.

So I left. I took one last look at my workstation. I took my mouse pad and damaged headphones with me for keepsakes. I could have asked for my work computer, but I was too shy to ask.

Well, it was good enough that I left. The company is about to close shop in the coming weeks. I have already abandoned ship.


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